Clinging to the line

OK, this is going to be a really sappy somewhat strange post so just a forewarning.

I moved the bassinet out of our bedroom today. It is LONG overdue. She has been in her own bed now for almost two months I would say? The bassinet has been serving as a catch-all for my school clothes. I take them off when I get home and put them in there. The funny thing is, Chip hasn't really said anything about the bassinet because I think he knows I don't really want to move it out. Our bedroom has been a little cluttered. Since we moved the boys into one room we have all these old baby blankets I guess, some people made, some were given to me, one was Adam's old comforter. And they are all in a pile in our room. As well as a bunch of other stuff. (This part of the post is really not important information.) But anyway, the other night I felt this draft and we realized it was this space of air between the air conditioner and the window so he took it out of the window. He was like, 'If we didn't have so much stuff in this room, it would be a little easier.' And that was the extent of the reference to the bassinet but like I said, the blankets are there, I have birthday present stuff on my floor, there's is a lot, not JUST the bassinet.

So today, I got up the nerve and took it down and out of the room. (As well and put all the other stuff away too.) I said as I brought it downstairs to him to take out, 'I think I am emotionally detached from this now, you can take it out.' He said, 'I don't think you are until you throw it away.' And I said, 'Well, I guess I'm not then because I'm not throwing it away.'

I'm not saving it because I want any more babies. Or maybe some clinical psychologist may say that is why I am saving it. But my mother in law has hers from her kids that my kids have slept in. Hers is still in her house too, she hasn't put it away yet. (From Anna I mean) I thought maybe I could save mine too for that reason. But it all makes me really sad. I titled this 'clinging to the line' because I still have my line on my stomach from when I was pregnant with her. And basically, I feel like that is all I have left of my pregnancies. My boobs are dried up, my period is back, my hair has fallen out and coming back I guess? I have an extra ten pounds I don't care about nor am I trying to do anything about really so I guess I could claim that too. But I still have my line. All of my infant clothes are gone, all of my maternity clothes are gone. I even tried to throw my pump out but Chip thinks I could donate that so I am going to try.

I can't WAIT until Anna is like two years old. The crying will diminish, we can do fun things as a family. Not that we can't now but with a baby baby it is really hard. So I look forward to that. But knowing that my pregnant small infant days are done is kinda sad to me. But knowing that my baby bearing is over makes me sad in a odd sort of way.

What the Furman Five have been up to

Here's a quick synopsis of what everyone has been doing, and some things I really don't want to forget about the kids. They aren't really anything too interesting but things I think I will enjoy reading and remembering in a few years. First for the boring people:

Me- Pretty much I am working working working. I think non-teachers and even teachers like me who have been out of it for four and a half years forget how much time you really put into the job if you want to do it right. And I am not saying I am a top notch teacher. I want to be one some day so that is what I am striving for, but I also don't know any other way to do it. I get to work a half hour early each day but I leave when we can leave. I work ALL day when I am there, no down time at all and then I come home and after the kids are in bed I continue to do school work. I need to figure out how to work smarter, not harder. But for me it's sort of like starting from scratch again. I am figuring out things as I go. I think in a few years I can lay a little lower. But who knows. Teaching is hard. I had to hunt someone down just so I could change a tampon. You are trapped in your room pretty much all day until lunch and prep and mine is back to back. So by 2:00, I NEED to run to the bathroom.

Chip- He is cutting wood, cutting wood and cutting more wood since we are heating three houses. Also as I am typing this he is enclosing our back little porch thing so all the barn clothes can go out there in a month or so when the cows go in the barn. This is going to be SO great because now my house won't smell like manure all winter.

Adam- Adam's new thing is hide and go seek. He wants to play every day and tries to make Van play. Chip usually plays with him every night. It's cute. He also gets little notes from a girl in his class whom the aide told me seems to be quite smitten with Adam. It's funny. Adam said one day she was mad because he was playing with the boys or something. I guess he is planning on marrying her in the stone building. I saved the note.

Van- He is potty trained but every time (we think) he farts he thinks he has to poop so he runs to the bathroom a lot. My favorite thing he does is says 'Tum here Mommy' and puts out his little hand to show you 'come here'. He's cute. I put the picture at the top of how he does his hand and he always sticks the arm straight out. I can't move the picture down here where I wanted it.

Anna- She likes to eat. We go on Wednesday for her six month well check (sniff sniff) and I am anxious to see what she weighs. It took Van a long time to like food but not her. She is eating Stage 2 foods already, which I know is just more basically, the consistency doesn't change. But she enjoys her food and is VERY chatty during eating time. Something that she does that is funny is that she likes to watch Chip dance. (I mean who wouldn't.) But we have her in her bouncy chair and she will get fussy. So Chip turns on the Lady GaGa CD. (He wanted it.) And when he does, she stops crying, sticks out her legs straight and her eyes get all jumpy because she is excited. And then he (and the boys usually) start dancing and she calms right down. I really want to put it into America's funniest videos, it's that funny.

Pumpkin Party 2009

This year's float I think was the best one yet. The theme was 'Be creative at your library.' Can you be any more general than that? So we thought and thought about it and we thought of the the story, The Little Engine That Could. On the front of the box I painted, I think I can, I think I can be creative at my library. I posted the first picture because it is a really good shot of the train head.

I can take no credit for the train or giraffes what-so-ever and almost feel bad when we have our name entered in the float and we didn't do the majority of the work. My friend Stacy is oh so creative and her husband made the train. They are keeping it at their house for a play set for their kids which I think they will love. I made the box out of plywood that we used for other floats so really it cost us overall very little. I think the bell on the train was the best part. I was supposed to be a jack in the box and throw out the candy to the kids on the street. The told us this year as we set up ready to go, no one is allowed to throw candy this year. We were bummed and the kids were REALLY bummed because they enjoy throwing it.

We had a great time as always. We got first place by the way. We said we weren't going to do it next year, with me working and three kids, even the box was a lot for me. But now we are on a float high since it was so much fun and we won. We'll see.

Something that makes me smile

It's done

A few people have come up and taken pictures of it. Chip is very proud. I think that it will look great in the spring when we have some flowers planted around it.